The Generosity of Our Elders

Early Lessons

I learned my first lessons in giving from my grandmother Susana, a strong-willed and intelligent woman of faith and purpose. In the summer months (from March-May in the Philippines) during school breaks, among the most memorable times I’ve spent with my grandmother were our church visits. During the week, my grandmother and I would hear mass often, sometimes twice or even thrice. We might visit the Redemptorist Church in Baclaran on Wednesdays, on Fridays at the Basilica of the Black Nazarene in Quiapo, and the parish church in Sta. Mesa on Sundays. In each of these places, as the collection plates weaved their way among the parishioners for church appeals, my grandmother would retrieve bills and coins from her purse that she would eventually place in my tiny hand to deposit in the plates. So much of my notions of charity, giving, and generosity are rooted in these early childhood experiences.

Mutual Aid

Closer to home, my grandmother and grandfather Leonardo opened their city dwellings to family members and relatives—often from their hometown province—who had aspirations to attend college in Manila. We looked up to these older aunts and uncles, all role models, who stayed with us as we grew up. As they pursued college degrees, they also tutored us in math and English, augmenting what we had learned from our elementary books or from watching Sesame Street or The Electric Company. As a kind of mutual aid, while my aunts and uncles lived with us, their families from the province would send us crates of fruits, dried fish, or sacks of rice.

We’re not in the 1%!

While we are not a family of extraordinary means, providing support for those experiencing a fire, a flood, or a typhoon disaster (a pandemic!) through the church’s social amelioration and anti-poverty programs was a compelling case, no further explanation needed. Before I ever learned about Goodwill, my grandparents also had practiced donating our slightly used or once-loved clothing, shoes, and accessories. Perhaps from their own experience with food insecurity having lived through the privation of wars, my grandparents helped those who faced hunger, offered jobs to those who sought work in their businesses, and spared a bed for a youngster who had a dream to earn a degree.

Classical Training

My grandparents exemplified for me the Filipino spirit of bayanihan, of communal unity, work and cooperation. Long before I learned Western values of philanthropy as someone whom a colleague had described once as “classically” trained in advancement or fundraising, my early experiences were my guideposts. Indeed, because of those early days as my younger self, I’ve been classically trained with my ancestors as my teachers.

Activating our Values

This month, as we celebrate Asian Pacific Desi American Heritage Month, Filipinos or Asian Americans have opportunities to express our unique philanthropic values, practices and goals. Through initiatives like Big Day of Giving or Giving In May, we can support causes here or in our motherland while in diaspora. As a community member, advocate, leader, or provocative thinker, we can serve as trusted messengers for our community to support a scholarship fund, give to a food pantry, advocate for equity and justice, or build a community center. We can be that person for someone as my grandparents were once to me.

Vince remembers and honors his grandmother Susana who passed away on May 2, 1999.